Universal Confidence Blog

Sorry for delay of this post!!

Let’s go back to basics again and try to identify what is self confidence. Because You are looking for something which will be easy to understand or use, you have to go deeply inside yourself and identify the cause of your problem. But you know this anyway.

Let me explain: You think that you lack self confidence and you behave that way almost every time when some type of situation occurs. Now think, this situation is not continuous is it? There is a specific time when you feel that way. So, there must be some kind of trigger to make you feel bad, and make you think that you have lost your confidence. The question is “is this really a self confidence problem? There is some sort of a system within you that causes you to be in a different mood every time you are close to your past “bad” experience!

And what about the time when you are confident? Don’t’ say that there is nothing like that. There is more time when you are confident than when you experiencing the change of your state, without even noticing.

Here is the truth: You are self confident in the space or time where there is no possibility of bad situations to confront. It is most probably at home or in your garage or garden etc… You see, you are very confident in particular situations.

So why do we concentrate on low self esteem instead of using your confidence everywhere and anytime?

The answer is …….FEAR!!!

You had some kind of experience where you have tried to do something, but instead of achieving your aim you received pain, embarrassment or even shock from the reaction. This was registered by your conscious mind and deeply transferred to subconscious mind which works as self defense.

All of this happened only because you were NOT ready for this kind of result in that situation, and you look at it as a defeat instead of a challenge!

Than every time a similar situation occurs, you feel fear which results in avoiding the situation, and blaming yourself for low self esteem later on! This fear is actually a translation of the pain which sits in your subconscious mind. We are humans and this is what we do. We avoid pain!

When I was about six year old I had an experience with a dentist. There was a time when my class had to go visit the dentist without being a previous warning, so everyone showed up. I had no experience with a dentist before. This was my first time. My name is alphabetically last so I had plenty of time to watch what was going on. There were about 20 children in front of me and every time someone came back from the dentist’s room, they shared the experience. This was very frightening and before I was called in, I was ultimately scared to death! From then on, I have always been scared of dentists although my own experience was without the actual pain.

So my concentration changed because of pure fear!! That’s it.

How far do you have to go to answer your questions? Is it really self confidence that affects your state of mind?

Good luck and let me know!!!

This entry was posted on Thursday, April 30th, 2009 at 8:41 pm and is filed under Self Confidence. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.